I want to encourage you…
Encourage your children, daily. Don’t wait for them to ask for it, or deserve it, you may never have an opportunity if you wait for these things, so find encouragement for them in the moment. There is always something, in every situation, that you can encourage. You may have to search diligently in certain seasons to find something that you can honestly encourage them in… but do it. Pray, and ask the Lord. He will gladly reveal to you how He has made your child. Chances are you are very much the same in certain aspects of your life, especially if they’ve got your genes!
If all that comes to mind is that he’s made a mistake just like you did when you were a kid, express that! He wants to be like you already, and this makes a great transition into what to do about a mistake allowing him to relate to his hero and follow in his hero’s footsteps to rectify the situation.
I have learned to use the actual words “I want to encourage you…” Sometimes the end of that sentence is “…encourage you away from…” or “…encourage you to really think about…” but this way of speaking has helped me to keep what I have to say encouraging, as well as given my children the heads-up that I’m trying to build them up, not tear them down.
Give encouragement freely. Be honest, but don’t refrain from building them up. They are looking for validation from their hero! Honesty is very important when you are encouraging them.
I am amazed at how intuitive children can be, and they know you better than they know anyone else. If you use some platitude to try to encourage your child(ren) simply because I told you to, they will see right through it! Or if you tell them the words you believe ought to be said without meaning them, the message you will communicate will be mixed.
Be honest in your encouragement. Speak what you truly believe about them. If you don’t truly believe something that you feel needs to be said, ignore your feeling and look for something with which you can honestly build them up.
I Thessalonians 5:11, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”