The year was 2003. I was involved with a few talent agencies in Chicago, IL who were bringing me work. I had been cast in a few Industrial Films, a couple of print ads, a Television commercial (that ran all over Chicagoland that year), and two independent films. I was working a flex-time “day job” so that I could take auditions at the drop of a hat, and chasing my dream which was to make a name for myself and speak out for Christ in the process. I used to say I wanted the responsibility of carrying the torch for Christ into an extremely dark world. Looking back, what I really wanted to do, was simply what I wanted to do… and I had found a way to make Jesus “a part of it.” …and He let me do it, for a time – He even allowed me to succeed at it.
But then I stopped winning auditions. Then I stopped getting audition opportunities. One day I realized that I had forced myself into a position to be “available,” and the only opportunity in the previous two months of availability (IF I had won the audition) would only pay $400! God was taking away the supports that I had feebly wedged in underneath me, and showing me that it was time for a change. I clearly understood that God was telling me: “It’s time to take up the responsibility of what I have already given you before you reach for more.”
At that time, I had a wife and two children who were depending on me to provide for them, and God had blessed us with a third child who was still in utero. The child still in the womb, was the example, blaring in my face, as the responsibility He was talking about. I realized, at that time, that taking care of a wife and a family is the biggest responsibility that we can be given as men. Yes, more than any job a man could possibly hold – the President of the United States of America should be a father first! …because at the end of our lives, no one will say, “I wish I spent more time at the office.” The regrets on deathbeds sound more like, “I wish I had been there more”; “I wish I had more time with you.”
WHAT ABOUT YOU?
Have you had a nagging feeling that your family is not getting as much of you as they should? Could God be speaking, “It’s time to take up the responsibility of what I have already given you, before you reach for more,” into your life? God has a plan for you, and He will never require you to neglect your children, nor your wife in order to achieve it. He designed the family for a reason, and He does not undermine His own plans.